I recently had a long, touching chat with Daily Express reporter Robert Fisk, who is battling cancer, something that I have also fought. Having 40% of my tongue removed was tough and painful – and isn’t at all helpful when you’re a professional singer. So yes, there have been bumps along the way, but I always felt that I’d make it through to the other side thanks to great care at Guy’s Hospital and two wonderful surgeons.
It was a regular dental check-up that flagged my illness, with oral cancer up 120% in the last decade, and the road has been long and quite difficult, but you just have to stay positive. It really is crucial. Something my dad taught me very many years ago, having served in the Army, was that fear itself can kill you.
So the terror of just hearing that you have a serious illness can seriously damage your immunity from a psychological perspective.
I was one of the lucky ones. As was my daughter, when she was seriously ill with meningitis a couple of years ago. We both treasure our recovery every single day. Like countless others who’ve come through a major illness, we now look at life in a very different way.
I also had a dose of that in my early twenties with my band Bucks Fizz as we had a very bad coach crash and I suffered a head injury, which paralysed me on the left side and left me injured for several years. That accident gave me an entirely new view on everything.
Shortly after, I left the group as my bandmate Mike Nolan had also suffered a major head injury. I just couldn’t ever see him – or the band – recovering.
I learned that it’s best not to sweat the small stuff, which is so easy to fall into even though none of it helps.
My religion and faith have helped me many times during tough periods. But staying positive isn’t possible for everyone. When you have a major illness, somehow there’s a strange element of guilt.
Have I looked after myself? Is it some form of karma? It’s difficult but at the end of the day you have to face reality. And that reality is: you just got unlucky.
Realising this can help you to remain strong and give yourself every opportunity to recover physically and, crucially, mentally.
When my daughter was ill a couple of years ago we were both offered some level of psychological support.
I declined because I had family support and didn’t want to drain resources other people may need. My daughter had one short session she found helpful, but moved on quite quickly.
But the mental side of illness is huge for many patients. So anything we can do to encourage more support in this area is a wonderfully positive act because we’re always battling even if we do recover. We battle with that dreaded question: will it return?
Which is why I support Robert’s Cancer Care crusade to ensure every NHS patient has access to vital mental health support. It will make our wonderful NHS even better.
Until that day comes – stay strong and believe in miracles.
This story originally appeared on Express.co.uk
