Actress and producer April Kelley was 27 when she was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, despite having shown symptoms since the age of 15. This is a common reality for patients as the average wait for a diagnosis is nearly 10 years, with many people risking their jobs, relationships and even lives in this time.
At the launch of Bipolar UK’s new awareness campaign, led by her film Maybe It’s Bipolar, April shared: “My diagnosis was a lifeline, and I do believe it saved my life. I was 15 when I first started showing symptoms, and I did attempt to take my own life. I then had 12 years of not knowing what was going on. I didn’t get to be my early 20s, I didn’t get to have that life. I’m certainly making up for it now, but as soon as I got that diagnosis, in a strange way, my life began.”
Now, April dedicates all of her work around bipolar awareness to her 15-year-old self. She added: “People think it’s brave to speak out but I am just doing it for her. I don’t want anyone to ever feel as scared and lonely as she did.
“If I were to say anything to her it would be: ‘Brace yourself, keep holding on. The lights will turn on and you’ll be able to see what you need to fight.’ When I texted my dad the news about my diagnosis, before he said anything else, he said: ‘I always knew there was a spark of genius in you’. That has always been there.”
Having learned to live with and manage her condition, April has urged others to monitor their sleep patterns closely. She explained: “The one simple thing that I can advise people to do is check your sleeping patterns.
“The best way to clock me and where I am is my sleeping pattern. On my low days I could sleep for 14 hours, not even need to wake up for a wee. And on my high days, I just don’t sleep.”
She’s also discovered the importance of leaning on her support network: “If you have the ability or the support network to flag it with someone. I’ve done it before, I’ve said; ‘Hey friend, I think I’m getting a bit manic’ and they say; ‘What do you want me to do?'”.
“I say; ‘Nothing, just flagging it.’ That is all you can do. As soon as you flagged it, they can see if you’re going off the rails or not, and then they can step in. Don’t stop me. But at least you know if I make a wrong turn or if I’ve made a poor decision if I’ve kissed the wrong person, you know to then step in.”
Whilst bipolar disorder is characterised by extreme mood swings, April stresses it’s far more complex than simply feeling happy one moment and sad the next. She describes her highs and lows as intensely “visceral”.
She added: “For the low days, if I don’t nip it in the bud, it’s quicksand. As soon as I’m under, I’m down for the count. One of the ways I would describe my high days is, you know that feeling just as someone’s made you jump. Or just as you’re about to go over the top of a log floom. It’s that constantly. It’s a literal vibration.”
Despite the risks, April confessed that she “hates to admit” that these highs can sometimes be enjoyable. This is one of the challenges in getting a diagnosis as many individuals only consult their GPs about the lows and not the highs.
She revealed: “I get so much done. I can get a week’s worth of work done in a day. No kidding. In all honesty, why would you want to be going to the doctors when you feel like that?”.
Bipolar UK estimates that over half of people in the UK with bipolar disorder remain undiagnosed. The charity’s latest campaign aims to raise awareness of the lesser-known symptoms and the free online test that can help individuals determine whether they might have the condition.
If this piece has affected you and you want to talk to someone, there are helplines and support groups available, many of them 24/7.
- Samaritans (116 123 in UK and Ireland) operates a 24-hour service available every day of the year. If you prefer to write down how you’re feeling, or if you’re worried about being overheard on the phone, you can email Samaritans at jo@samaritans.org. Anyone can contact Samaritans FREE any time from any phone on 116 123, even a mobile without credit. This number won’t show up on your phone bill.
- PAPYRUS (0800 068 41 41) is a voluntary organisation supporting teenagers and young adults who are feeling suicidal.
- Mind (0300 123 3393) is a charity based in England providing advice and support to empower anyone experiencing a mental health problem. They campaign to improve services, raise awareness and promote understanding.
- Bipolar UK provides support groups, communities, online resources and a one-to-one peer support line to help people with bipolar.
This story originally appeared on Express.co.uk
