Dolly: Well, hello, dollars
Tennessee. Dolly Parton. 10 Grammys. 2 Hollywood Walk of Fames. She’s now getting a face-lift for her multimillion visitors a year Dollywood park in that state. A 10-year $500 mil makeover, this year a roller coaster, new hotel.
Dolly: “Can’t get so busy making a living that you forget to make a life. Make time for fun.”
Yeah. Also the park’s income beats grits.
More from the Volunteer State. Tina Turner memory. Besides a highway named for her in Nutbush, once — in one shop — at one time — one visit — she bought 125 pairs of shoes.
Go big, go home
Texas. Official state song “Texas, Our Texas” was written by a guy from Liverpool. So comes now its Attorney General Ken Paxton. Accused of corruption, bribery, etcetera — yet re-elected again. Now impeached.
Who cares since they already had the Alamo. But — hark. Texas’ last impeachment was their Gov. Jim “Pa” Ferguson. After they dumped him his wife Miriam “Ma” Ferguson ran for governor. And served for two terms nonconsecutively.
The eyes of Texas are upon them.
Two forks, one road
Hamptons. Awakening from its deep dream of sleep — but not widening its one stupid asinine road into the area — Southforker magazine mumbles June 17 Westhampton Beach’s Main Street’s Great Lawn will do chefs, restaurants, spirits.
July 20 sister magazine Northforker dittos at Southampton College and to end summer Borghese Vineyard does whatever.
Our country ’tis of wee. How about handing longtime full-timer residents butter knives to just scratch out another road lane?
A dressing down
Florida. Note to Mrs. DeSantis. Easy. Down, girl. Enough with repeated long flowing cape sleeves. Not even the Angel Gabriel dresses with billowing wings. Calm yourself.
Mrs. Trump had training. Mrs. Kennedy had breeding. Mrs. DeSantis has low-class overdressing. Anyone see downtown South Dakota housewives rushing to copy her outfits? Pay attention: Hubby could blow the mouse house — and the White House.
Bidding adieu
Christies’s is auctioning Donna Summer’s Polaroids, gowns, paintings, platinum “MacArthur Park” record estimated $1,000 to $3,000, unused Forest Hills concert tickets $500 to $800, size 12 rhinestone silk gown $1,000 to $1,500. Plus Heritage Auctions is unloading “Cheers” (NBC TV, 1982-1993) bar. Brass railing, rear unit, leatherette stools, wooden walls. $210,000 with commission. For Ted Danson, Woody Harrelson or Rhea Perlman it’s extra.
Drugstore. Father: “These condoms are for safe sex.” Kid: “Why three in a package?” Father: “For high school boys. One for Friday, Saturday, Sunday.” Seeing a box of 12, kid asks, “What’s these for?” Father: “For married men. For January, February, March.”
Not only in New York, kids — please — not only in New York.
This story originally appeared on NYPost
