So where’s our hardworking commander-in-chief go for a break? Canadian Maritimes? This would be not before we annex it with the rest of whatever’s left of Canada upon which our president periodically pees. So, no.
The Cotswolds? Naah. Because Michelle might find him there. Haters know exactly where he should go — but Montauk’s no good because he’d have to listen to Bill O’Reilly.
Better he go to host Elvis’ packed Italian restaurant Canaletto where East Siders are still waiting for a table.
Meanwhile, our vice president was resting his beard in the Cotswolds. His current heavy duty is downtime.
Maybe Putin’s well-secured, heavily protected Black Sea dacha? The pile comes with a submarine bar and indoor hockey rink so he can always score.
Campobello? FDR always went there — while Eleanor absolutely 100% did not. Not!
Switzerland? Naahh. He just laid an 800% tariff on chocolate or something. India? Don’t think so.
Donald isn’t heavy on hobbies. What should he do — weave? Knit? Tat? Crochet?
Cuffing season?
PAY attention. A former NYPD VIP says more cops do not necessarily equal better safety. This report states that when the uniformed NYPD types lessened — crime declined! Believe this? If you do, Girl Scout cookies will get hustled to you in solitary.
Already this year, 1,555 officers have left the force. More than 57,000 felonies in first half of the year. In 2024, it was 123,890 felonies total with 32,500 cops, lowest since 1990. Politicians like Mandamnhim are not what you’d call mathematicians.
Death defined
BILL Boggs and Bill McCuddy at an East Hampton book party. Discussing books: a real California crime story. Abusive ex-boyfriend. The female kicked him out. He then strangled her. She was on life support five days. The charge: Attempted murder. When she died the charge became murder. In this true story the judge supposedly disliked the prosecutor so they convicted this guy of manslaughter. He only did 3½ years despite prior history of violence against women.
The book party discussion dealt with law. Murder 1 means calculation, intent. Seems somehow that to shoot someone — which takes a minute — shows clear intent. But strangle someone to death — which takes maybe four or five minutes — it’s somehow “manslaughter?”
Listen, if you know the name of this book: Tell me!
Comics ‘Pickup’ the pieces
MEANWHILE, to help the cause of love and safety comes Eddie Murphy and Pete Davidson. Their new film’s: “The Pickup.” Their job is to steal $60 million from a casino. Davidson says, “I play a special little idiot.” Me, I make no comment. I’m sort of a nice lady.
AND to keep B’way alive and thriving, trudges in now yet another oldie. “The Sound of Music” whose sound probably we haven’t heard for weeks. It says it’s a North American tour. Right. Like where else would it be? Like maybe they’re hustling seats on the front hump of a camel?
Old-time regurgitated ancient passe theater is now so prevalent that young aspiring showbiz minded schoolkids are actually preferring to stay in their rooms and do homework.
Only in New York, kids, only in New York.
This story originally appeared on NYPost
